Crazy busy week

So, The last job I had before the one I have now was before I was even pregnant. Sophie is almost three. I like my new job. I do. But fuck I am so so so TIRED! I swear no one in this house lets me get more than 4 hours of sleep a night.

I have worked 11 out of the 14 days Ive had the job. Im exhausted. Then Bill gets sick. Some nasty respiratory crap. Then Sophie gets sick(And is still sick) Then of course mommy gets sick. I have some nasty stomach virus and whatever Bill shared with me. Sophie has been in bed for an hour and has woken up THREE times screaming. Im really hoping that there is not a trip to the emergency room later tonight *KNOCK ON WOOD*

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. We are spend it with two of our good friends. Just the five of us. Both of our families are doing very low key things this year so we decided to stay home and relax and cook our own Thanksgiving dinner. Oh God how I hope Bill doesnt fuck the turkey up. Then Friday I have to be at work at 3:30 AM for a day of retail hell. WOOT (Note the sarcasm)

I hope everyone has a happy Thanksgiving!!!

Do you hide behind your blog?

Ok so as Im sure most of you know, the blogosphere has been full of the dramz lately. Can I for one say IM OVER IT. I don't partake in ANY of the bullshit. But I see it happen and a friend of mine has been personally attacked by bloggers, almost on a daily basis.

Let me say this. Any woman who is shallow enough to HIDE behind a computer screen obviously needs to pick up a few hobbies BC not only is it childish, its SAD. Its sad that some people have nothing better to do with their time than to devote their day to TRYING to make someone miserable, personally attacking and downright stalking them. I get so damn sick of reading a blog that, although no names are mentioned, downright bashes someone. I get sick of hopping on Twitter to see what my bloggy buddies are up to and I see nothing but straight bitchiness and hateful comments.

COME ON. We are grown ass women here. I may not be involoved in this shit but Ive spent the week watching a good friend of mine be personally attacked and talked shit on all over the net and its RIDICULOUS.

Trisha, I know you, I know you arent letting this shit get to you. Keep your head up mama! Oh and by the way, I totally voted for you ;)

Mommy. Needs. Sleep

I hate daylight savings time. It never fails to completely screw up Sophie's already horrid sleep schedule. Princess has decided lately that naps totally suck and so by 5ish O'clock the child is miserable and in a full on ass kicking mood. She goes to bed at 5-7 and wakes super duper early therefore causing her to be more tired the following day. Its a vicious cycle that is draining every fucking ounce of energy out of my body.

Yesterday. She falls asleep at like 6:30. Sleeps soundly through the evening. All is well. HA! Mommy stays up until 3:15am feeding her addiction playing around in the blogosphere.(Man this new raspberry crystal light is badass) No sooner does my head hit my pillow and I start to drift off does she come waltzing in to the bedroom. "Ake up Mommy!!!! Ake up Noooooowwwwww!!!" Son. Of. A. Bitch. It is 4:02am when I look at the clock. Like 45 minutes of sleep.

We come out to the living room and I turn on cartoons and get her breakfast. ( Before you ask, no, she will not go back to sleep. Once she is up. She is up.) I know better than to fall asleep BC she waits for that then wreaks havoc on the house. *Shiver*

Dear Lord Baby Jesus,
Thank you for espresso. Without espresso mommy would not survive.

The adventures that are Sophia.

So. Sophia had a platelet transfusion set up to start at noon today. Well. It didn't quite happen that way.Let me explain why.

It was about 10:30 so I decided that we were going to have an early lunch so we could arrive a little early.So, I make Sophie and I a couple of sandwiches and I go down the hall to put the rest of my load in the wash. *SIGH*

I walk in to the dining room to find that my maniac of a lovely daughter has taken the slice of american cheese off of her sandwich and....Are you ready for this? Shoved it UP HER NOSE. Along with a few hunks of bread. O....M....G. Im freaking out. I grab the disney princess flashlight and I grab some tweezers and I wrestle the child to the ground to try and look up her nose. I can barely see the bread and the cheese anymore and she was starting to complain that is hurt. FUCK. So, I call the pediatrician. They have a nurse call me and the nurse says to go to the ER. OMG, WHAT!? I CAN'T, freaking she has a VERY important procedure scheduled! Yeah, but it was our only choice apparently. they said it could travel in to her sinus cavity and get infected and cause all kinds of problems. So I VERY hesitantly cancel the transfusion. They say if we can make it by 1pm that they would still go on with starting the transfusion.

So, off we were to the ER to get my child De-cheesed. We arrive and my precious angel REFUSES to take off the halloween bucket on her head that she has been wearing for two days claiming it is her HAT. Ok, whatEVER. I am picking my battles.Wear the damn bucket, bucket head. So we get there and we wait. we wait a little more and then we are seen. The doctor used a scope to look in her nose and she said that she could see the big globs of cheese and bread. So she leaves and comes back like forever later with this little machine that had a teeny hose attached to it. they stuck the tube up her nose(while 3 nurses and I held her down) and suctioned the gelatinized mess out of there. Her nose bled for like 2 and a half hours BC of the fact that there was CHEESE and BREAD in there. But she's is fine. We never made it to her appointment so she now goes in on the 28th. Never a dull moment, eh?

There is nothing good on TV at 3am

T'was the night before Monday and all through the house. Not a creature was stirring....Except for Sophie.

3am. I am snuggled warm and cozy in my bed when..."Mommmyyy!!! WAKE UP! Wake up mommy, Sophie needs to eat!" *SIGH* so I roll my frumpy, half asleep butt out of bed and hobble wobble down the hallway in to the kitchen. Sophie was already browsing the pantry. Heres how the conversation went:

Me: What would you like to eat Sophia?
Sophie: Cookies
Me: No dear. It is the middle of the night I am not giving you cookies. What else would you like?
Sophie: Chocolate cookies.
Me: Sophia.. Mommy said no cookies. You may have waffles,cereal or a special K bar.
Sophie: I want goldfish.
Me: Fine.

Yes, I fed my daughter Goldfish crackers at 3am. I do not think she will be adversely affected by this.

So, I get her situated on her Dora couch, I lay on the couch with my pillow and I flip the TV on. Infomercials,nope. Full house, Nah. Some bizarre anime crap, No thanks. Lilo and Stitch, Score. So we relax in our little spots and start watching lilo and stitch. I remember, it was 3:19am bc I had looked to see how much longer the show was one. Next thing I know the second episode of Lilo and Stitch was on. It was 3:37 and my daughter was sitting on me. Diaper less. Oh my hell. I find her pants. They were dry. Didnt see any immediate pee spots so we were good. I thought.

I go to get her a glass of milk and I.Step.In.A.Huge.Puddle.Of.Pee. omg uggh. no. yuck. Im not even wearing socks!!!!!

I just had to laugh. I was to damn tired to care.

2 parts soup / 0 parts water

Sophie and I were having our daily power struggle this afternoon and after about eh.......45 minutes of her refusing foods then agreeing to eat them so I cook them and she once again refuses them she finally agreed to eat Campbells chicken double noodle soup. Ok, fine. Not my first choice for her but its food and its easy.

I get her soup made and sit down with her at the table only to hear "mama, its yucky. Soup is yucky mama." ugggh. Again. Again she is refusing to eat what I made her. Or is she?

She kept insisting it was yucky so I tasted it. Whoa. Yeah, it definitely tasted like greasy chicken ass. Hmmm. So I look at the can. Doesn't expire until 2010. So what the hell?

Well, while I was examining the can something catches my eye 'mix soup + 1 can water' Shit! I didn't add the water. So, essentially I tried feeding my child concentrated broth. Neat.

I swear some days I actually have to look in the mirror to make sure my head is still attached.

If there is one thing you never want your mother-in-law to mention

It's your sex life.

So some of you have heard stories of my mother-in-law. Those of you who haven't, she is a one of a kind kook. I love the woman dearly but she is out of her damn mind.

So, she calls the other day and says she wanted to stop by and see Sophie. OK, fine, whatever. So she comes over and says she has something for Bill. She....she handed him 3 cialis tablets. What in the fuck? Seriously? Did she actually just give my husband,her SON, a handful of erectile dysfunction tablets? She says to him, "Now I don't know if you are having any issues but your dad was and these pills have made him a phenomenal lover".

I just started laughing my ass off. I mean seriously, WTF?