My public service announcement

Ok so, Sophie has got a nasty cold kickin right now. Stuffy nose, icky hoarse cough. Well,2 days ago I go to walgreens. I ask the pharmacist what, if anything I can give her for her cough. She says to give her mucinex for kids. 1/2tsp every 4 hours. sure, ok, sounds good to me. So I buy it. I give it to her, on the second attempt bc she spit it at me on my first try. We go on about our day blah blah. Ok so when Sophie gets sick, Bc of her sensory integration she gets EXTREMELY out of hand. She gets very elated and hyper,almost drunk. She doesnt 'look' sick when she is sick. she looks like a maniac monkey child running around just really hyper. Anywho, towards the end of the say she starts getting VERY VERY sassy. Im talking straight out violent. Slapped me in the face twice,threw a remote at Bills head(Although I admit I secretly laughed at this)and tormented the cats more than usual. So this continues and only gets worse.

It was so bad this afternoon that I called the pediatrician BC she was completely and utterly out of hand. Im talking to the nurse and explaining to her what was going on and I nonchalantly mention that she has been taking mucinex. the nurse stops me saying "WHAT!? Well, how long has she been coughing!?!?" Uh, 3 days, constantly for 3 days.

So, the nurse is all, "OMG who told you to give her THAT?" Uh, the pharmacist did....the bottle says its for ages 2-6. Sophie is almost 3. So she continues to tell me that the AAP has not approved any cold or cough medicines for kiddos under 6 (Which I knew,but I thought they took all the disapproved stuff off the shelf!)

Apparently the active ingredient in cough meds can cause violence and erratic behavior in small children. FRICKING LOVELY. Explains EVERYTHING.

So,folks, moral of this story is: If your child is under the age of 6, Dont listen to your local pharmacist if they say it's ok to give him/her cough medicine. you will not like the outcome!

A day on the farm- When ducks attack- Again

So, you may remember, a few months back I had a little scuffle with a demonic duck on steroids. This duck is such an ass, Let me tell you.

Well, Sophia and I went to the park Saturday with hot dogs and a loaf of bread to feed the fish and the ducks. So we go to the first pond. We feed the ducks, No fish got the hot dog bc the maniac ducks ate them all. Anyways, We head over to the lake and the ducks out in the lake swimming see us and start heading our way for a snack. They hop out of the water, these sweetie ducks are eating the bread out our hands, it was good times. And then I saw him. I saw the demonic steroid freak duck swimming my way. There was no denying his bright orange bill and eyes. Oh and the fact that he is like mutantly gigantic. He swaggers out of the water, spots a stray piece of bread on the groun and heads for it. I grab Sophies hand and we started slowly backing up.

Freak duck eats his bread and rears up at me, spreads his wings and starts charging me hissing at me!!! Uh. Shit. So, I grab Sophie and start running from it. And then...OMG. Freak duck turns around and JUMPS IN MY STROLLER and starts attacking my loaf of bread that I had sitting in the seat. Ho-ly shit. So here comes a good samaritan to my rescue and he starts yelling at freak duck and grabs my stroller and he finally falls out. Thank you Mr. Nice passerby.




Freak duck eating my bread before he lost his damn mind.



Mr. Nice passerby saving my stroller and bread.

If there is one thing you never want your mother-in-law to mention

It's your sex life.

So some of you have heard stories of my mother-in-law. Those of you who haven't, she is a one of a kind kook. I love the woman dearly but she is out of her damn mind.

So, she calls the other day and says she wanted to stop by and see Sophie. OK, fine, whatever. So she comes over and says she has something for Bill. She....she handed him 3 cialis tablets. What in the fuck? Seriously? Did she actually just give my husband,her SON, a handful of erectile dysfunction tablets? She says to him, "Now I don't know if you are having any issues but your dad was and these pills have made him a phenomenal lover".

I just started laughing my ass off. I mean seriously, WTF?